Not wanting to have children was one of the very few thing I knew with certainty when I was growing up. I didn't know why that was, really, assumed my confused and unhappy childhood was to blame. I am now 58 and have never doubted my decision, in fact know with certainty that it was the right one. God knows what would have happened to them and me if I had given in to the pressure. But I do know that as I get older my future will become more uncertain, my husband and I relying only on each other until one is no longer able. It scares me, increasingly so, and saddens me that we don't seem to be able to accommodate this. Thank you for this Jody x
I love this. I’m sixty eight. Thought I had childlessness sorted. But here I am teetering on the brink of another childless threshold and feeling a bit scared.
I am almost 75 and remained childless in spite of years of infertility treatments that culminated in an ovariohysterectomy at 41 that ended all hope. That was a devastating low point in my life that took years to recover from. Even therapy, though helpful with so many other issues, could not deal with this one. It was never recognized for the deep wound it was to my psyche. Recently events reopened that wound and I have found myself once again in deep pain. I've been searching the web for a name to put to it, and in the process I found you. It helps so much to know that I am not alone and that there is a path forward from this dark place in which I find myself now. I am grateful that you are there and have given my pain a name.
thank you for tackling this Jody. I am not as brave as you, but delighted to go with you on your journey. I am 68, widowed less than a week, and back in a world where people see me as "Oh so Alone, poor thing, no children to help her". I have been alone a lot in my life, so can't quite related to their horrified projections, and yet.....so appreciative of your honesty and openness.
It may sound cliché.....I am now 51, from the age of 34 Yoga, breathwork and meditation in some form have been a friend because as you so rightly say at times a childless life can be a uniquely lonely place xx
Thank you very much for this, I identify on so many levels... I have named my menopause ‘the final insult’.... in that every foray into womanhood has brought its own unique physical and mental discomfort...
Not wanting to have children was one of the very few thing I knew with certainty when I was growing up. I didn't know why that was, really, assumed my confused and unhappy childhood was to blame. I am now 58 and have never doubted my decision, in fact know with certainty that it was the right one. God knows what would have happened to them and me if I had given in to the pressure. But I do know that as I get older my future will become more uncertain, my husband and I relying only on each other until one is no longer able. It scares me, increasingly so, and saddens me that we don't seem to be able to accommodate this. Thank you for this Jody x
I love this. I’m sixty eight. Thought I had childlessness sorted. But here I am teetering on the brink of another childless threshold and feeling a bit scared.
I am almost 75 and remained childless in spite of years of infertility treatments that culminated in an ovariohysterectomy at 41 that ended all hope. That was a devastating low point in my life that took years to recover from. Even therapy, though helpful with so many other issues, could not deal with this one. It was never recognized for the deep wound it was to my psyche. Recently events reopened that wound and I have found myself once again in deep pain. I've been searching the web for a name to put to it, and in the process I found you. It helps so much to know that I am not alone and that there is a path forward from this dark place in which I find myself now. I am grateful that you are there and have given my pain a name.
thank you for tackling this Jody. I am not as brave as you, but delighted to go with you on your journey. I am 68, widowed less than a week, and back in a world where people see me as "Oh so Alone, poor thing, no children to help her". I have been alone a lot in my life, so can't quite related to their horrified projections, and yet.....so appreciative of your honesty and openness.
Thanks for the lovely writing Jody - im going into my next life chapter too - excited and a little nervous but i definitely dont feel alone
It may sound cliché.....I am now 51, from the age of 34 Yoga, breathwork and meditation in some form have been a friend because as you so rightly say at times a childless life can be a uniquely lonely place xx
Thank you very much for this, I identify on so many levels... I have named my menopause ‘the final insult’.... in that every foray into womanhood has brought its own unique physical and mental discomfort...
A subject close to my heart! Here’s to growing older gracefully, disgracefully or in any way that’s calling us! Love xx
Wonderful. Made me gulp and choke back a tear at the end.
Thrilled to see you tackling this subject, Jody! xo